dry rose flower next to broken heart shaped cookie

Karmic Relationships

If you’ve had unsuccessful relationships, know that it’s common to have several relationships in your lifetime. Not everyone immediately meets their soulmate & lives happily ever after with them. While all relationships have their ups & downs, karmic relationships are typically doomed from the start to teach you necessary lessons to become a better person. Different from the well-known, loving relationship of two soulmates, a karmic relationship is often dramatic, tumultuous, & temporary.

Karmic Relationships

I believe that every relationship I’ve entered into so far has been a karmic relationship. I now take ownership of my past karmic behaviors, as I’ve definitely been a karmic partner to others in the past. But the key indicator of a truly loving relationship is genuine care, honesty, kindness, & unconditional love. Here are some examples & key indicators that you’re in a karmic relationship, or you are actually the karmic.

Abuse

Any form of abuse can be present in a karmic relationship, including emotional, financial, physical, psychological, sexual, etc. I am very self-aware. Through reflecting on my past relationships, I can admit that I was physically abusive to one of my exes.

On a road trip, my boyfriend wanted to drive Highway 1 from SoCal back to my home in the San Francisco Bay Area. Being young & impatient, I hated that this transformed a normally 5 hour car ride into a 12+ hour road trip, because he needed to stop several times to take pictures. I was moody & rude to him the entire drive up, because let’s face it, I was selfish.

I hated that he wanted to do what he wanted despite how I felt. At 18 years old, I expected him to bend over backward to make sure I was happy. I basically chose to throw a tantrum like a child in his car. As a way to cheer me up & lighten the mood, he decided to swerve the car back & forth along the road. He laughed as he watched me sway with the car, thinking it was funny & that it would make me smile.

Instead, it made me even more angry. I yelled at him for driving recklessly because another car could come rapidly around one of the turns, cause him to swerve off the road completely & off a cliff, killing us both. I called him annoying & immature, & I started to physically hit him on his arms, back, & shoulders to stop him from swerving in fear for my life & my safety. At the time, I felt justified for being physically abusive towards him, but considering how I behaved that entire day, I can see now that we were both karmic to each other in our karmic relationship.

Cheating

Cheating, emotional or physical cheating on any level, is another indicator of a karmic relationship & karmic behavior. Within the same college relationship, we both cheated on each other. Since he lived in SoCal & I lived in the Bay Area, we were only physically together for about 8 months during the year for school.

The Summer before we broke up, he started cheating on me with his co-worker at the gym he worked at. And the semester before that, I emotionally cheated on him with my TA. By breaking his trust, he no longer trusted me to have any male friends. And while I thought it was ridiculous at the time, I don’t blame him for that anymore. Discovering that he had been cheating on me all Summer with his co-worker a month after we broke up is what hurt the most.

As someone who has emotionally cheated & found out about other options my past boyfriends hid from me, know that entertaining other options & emotionally cheating is just as bad as physically cheating on your partner. If you already have a replacement or possible replacements lined up, you never truly loved your partner or respected your relationship with them.

By learning from emotionally cheating on my boyfriend, I don’t tolerate cheating of any kind. When I’m in a committed relationship, I ignore anyone who slides into my DMs or offers to buy me a drink at a club. Because in order to find a committed partner, I know that I need to fully commit to my partner too.

If my ex boyfriend suddenly has a new girlfriend days or weeks following our breakup, I can now recognize & accept that I was in a karmic relationship. Just as I am faithful & loyal to my current partner, I need & want my partner to choose me & only me.

Insulting & Unsupportive

Karmic relationships are often conditional. If your partner only wants to date you if you act, behave, or look a certain way, you’re probably in a karmic relationship. If your partner endlessly tries to change you, puts you down, or is unsupportive of your hopes & dreams, they’re probably a karmic partner.

As outlined in my Palm Springs blog post, I’ve had a lot of issues with past karmic partners. One of my exes told me that the “sexy” faces I make are unattractive. Another ex was obsessed with me & tried to control everything I did down to how I ate. My other ex told me that I was charging too much for my Oracle & Tarot services right before I decided to launch in February 2021.

But I’m happy to say that going forward, I only want to date someone who loves me exactly as I am. I don’t want to be with someone who wants to control me. And I only want to date someone who supports my ambition, drive, & entrepreneurial mindset. I know what my time & energy is worth. So whether I want to change my career to become an Interior Designer, go back to school for my MBA, or raise my pricing for my Oracle & Tarot services, because I feel overbooked, my future partner will support me & believe in me just as much as I believe in myself.

The Relationship Ends

Karmic relationships are meant to come to an end once the lesson has been fulfilled. They can start out as passionate & all-consuming, then quickly burn out as quickly as they started. So considering that I’m still single & none of my past relationships have lasted, I can only assume that they were all karmic.

For a long time, I was a firm believer in not giving second chances. As someone who believes in true, unconditional love, my heart has been dragged through the mud, stabbed, & stolen without my love being returned more times that I’d like to admit. Now I’ve learned that while I’m still allowed to love unconditionally, getting a second chance to win my heart is a privilege. I should never continue to give love to a person or a situation if it compromises my integrity.

Have you ever been in a Karmic Relationship? How did it end? And what did you learn from it? Let me know in a comment below.

XO Denise

SOURCES

MindBodyGreen

chrysanthemum on pile of books on table

Words of Wisdom

I am lucky to have the most amazing family members. Because of them, I have lots of great advice from over the years. But today, I’m going to share two of my favorite words of wisdom that I hold closest to my heart.

“Accept the fact that you’re a dork, & your life will be a lot easier.” – My Dad

While I forget the context, this is one of my favorite things my Dad has ever said to me. In life, we often get too caught up in how others view us. Too many people are prisoners to their ego. Instead of being authentic & genuine, they’re too busy trying to look “cool”, desperate to not be labeled as weird or different. By accepting the fact that I’m a dork, I’m able to escape my ego. I can be myself without fear, which in turn makes my life easier as well.

“It is your greatest misfortune if you have never met me.” – My Great-Grandmother, Leonora San Agustin

My great-grandmother, Leonora San Agustin, is one of the most influential women in Asia. She became the first female Chemical Engineer in the Philippines in 1939. This quote is one of my favorites. She inspires me to always be myself, & anyone who isn’t for me. The loss isn’t mine. It’s their misfortune if they never get or want the opportunity to meet me. My Lola Leonie is a go-getter, & she always succeeds in anything she put her mind to. She is brilliant, & I know that she passed down her intelligence & writing skills to me. Please check out this brilliant article she wrote in 2007 at 92 years old!

What are the best words of wisdom or advice given to you? Please share them in a comment below.

XO Denise

eclipse digital wallpaper

Eclipse: The Sun & The Moon

“The Sun loved the Moon so much he died every night to let her breathe.”

Last week, I came across the entire Twilight saga on Hulu, & I felt compelled to watch it all: Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, & Breaking Dawn Part 1 & Part 2. I read the books while I was in college over a decade ago, but I haven’t thought much about the Twilight Saga since then. It felt very timely, since this last Wednesday, May 26th, 2021, we had a total lunar eclipse.

A total lunar eclipse occurs when the Moon & the Sun are on exact opposite sides of the Earth. A total lunar eclipse only occurs every four to five years. Despite the Moon being in the Earth’s shadow, sunlight is still able to reach the Moon as it passes through Earth’s atmosphere, filtering out blue light. This makes the Moon appear red, also known as a “Blood” Moon. Do you get the relation to the Twilight saga yet?

When the Moon moves between the Sun & the Earth, it blocks the light of the Sun from reaching Earth, also known as a solar eclipse. The last time we had a full solar eclipse was July 2, 2019, & we won’t have another until April 8th, 2024. This dance of the Earth, coming between the Moon, & the Sun reminds me of long-distance relationships and how circumstances that are beyond your control can affect your connection with your partner.

Total Eclipse of the Heart

The quote “The Sun loved the Moon so much he dies every night to let her breathe.”, the Pixar short film, Day & Night, & the song “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler recently struck a chord in me. The Sun & the Moon have an incredibly romantic yet tragic love story. The Sun & the Moon have minimal time together in the sky at dusk & dawn. The Moon passes in front of the Sun once every 29.5 days, which we know as a New Moon, & solar eclipses only occur two to four times a year.

It is in the Sun & the Moon’s bigger purpose that makes their need to be apart tragic. The Sun gives us energy. It allows life on Earth to grow & thrive. The moon moves our oceans as well as controls our climate with its gravitational pull that shifts the Earth’s axis. Like the Universe, relationships involve different entities that are constantly changing, evolving, & in motion. If you’re mindful & aware of your intuition, you know when you or your partner is in darkness, but what we can learn from the Sun & the Moon is that separation doesn’t have to affect or control the quality of your relationship.

The Sun & the Moon have minimal time, when they are completely aligned & seen together. There’s a reason why humans are obsessed with eclipses & the energy that surrounds them. We’re all well aware that it’s a special occurrence that needs to be enjoyed & cherished. Similar to a long-distance relationship, any time in person is better than time apart. If the sun & the moon can make things work, a long-distance albeit true, soul-connection between two people can work too. They can each take a step back to let the other shine in the spotlight. Then whenever they’re aligned & the timing is right, they reconnect. And when they do, the whole world stops to watch them.

The Twilight Saga

I am about to spoil the Twilight Saga books & the movies, so feel free to stop reading now, if you haven’t read or watched them & still want to. But I really don’t care whether or not you like the Twilight Saga, because as a writer, it has some of the best literary archetypes as well as Moon metaphors in it:

The Star-Crossed Lovers

Twilight is the time between night & sunrise. Bella is a human who falls in love with a vampire. Similar to the Sun & the Moon, Edward needs to stay in the shadows & out of the sunlight. But Bella, like the Sun, is the bright & shiny new girl in town, who has all eyes constantly on her. For all intents and purposes, Edward tries his best to push Bella away & prove to her that he’s bad & no good for her. Ultimately, he realizes that no matter how hard he tries to stay away for her own good, their connection is magnetic & their gravitational pull toward each other is uncontrollably strong. No matter how far away he tries to run from her, she’s still in his head & pulling at his heartstrings, until he ultimately gives in & surrenders to his love for her.

The Fall

After what seems like a happy, stable relationship in Twilight, New Moon brings in the Fall. Not only does it start in the season of Fall, but it’s the Fall of Bella, Edward, & their relationship. Edward decides that he has to leave & breaks up with Bella the day after her birthday in New Moon. He lies to her, saying that he doesn’t love her, never did, & that he doesn’t want her anymore for her own safety. Bella immediately falls into a deep depression. She becomes emotionally numb & stays that way for months, unsure if her love with Edward was ever real. The second book is appropriately named New Moon, signifying Bella’s new life cycle, without Edward by her side.

Death & Rebirth

Bella “dies” & is reborn a few times throughout the Twilight saga. In Twilight, Edward has to suck out the vampire venom from her blood without killing her. Bella sees & feels death, but she miraculously survives because of Edward’s willpower. In New Moon, Bella dies then has to relearn how to live her life without Edward. In Breaking Dawn, Bella dies then is finally reborn as a vampire. She willingly accepts her new immortal destiny, because she’d rather spend eternity with him than remain human.

The Battle Between Good & Evil

Even Vampires have light & dark counterparts, Jacob’s werewolf pack & the Cullen family join forces in Eclipse & again in Breaking Dawn to build an army to defend themselves over “eviler” groups of vampires. The third book, Eclipse, demonstrates the light & dark coming together. The final book, or two-part movie, Breaking Dawn, showcases a new day & a brighter future for everyone. Despite their differences, vampires & werewolves were able to reach an understanding for the greater good, because they’re stronger together than apart.

We can all learn from the Sun & the Moon. Two individuals can be independent, strong, & unique by themselves, but when their connection is undeniable, everyone will be able to take a step back & see that they’re better & even more special when they are together. The Sun & the Moon only spend brief moments with one another, but their long-distance relationship works. Their sporadic & short encounters are so magical that it makes all the waiting & time spent apart, shining & glowing on their own, worth it. How can you bring that same energy into your relationship?

XO Denise

SOURCES

NASA

white l o v e led signage

What is Love?

Unconditional love feels magical. Too often, individuals focus on what they want from their partner, instead of accepting their partner as they are. With my Cartomancy, Oracle, & Tarot love readings, I teach my clients to stay rational & loves themselves, because it’s important to not become too attached to a specific outcome. When you’re blinded by love, you ignore red flags. It’s not my job to confirm or deny if the individual that you’re asking about is your person. But I give you the advice to help you decide if your partner in question is worth the pain & heartache.

About a month ago, I updated the bio on my personal Instagram to “1 Corinthians 13: 4-8”. I’ve loved this bible verse since the first time I heard it. Even if you’re not Catholic or Christian, it’s safe to agree that it’s a beautiful way to describe love. I use it today as a guide for my thought process.

Love is patient.

If your person is pressuring you to be physically intimate, commit, get a pet, or have children before you’re ready, they do not love you. Your true love will never rush you or want to make you feel anything but comfortable & safe with them. Someone who loves you understands if you’re not ready. Taking intimacy to the next level or taking a huge, milestone step forward when the time is right is important. Your person is patient & willing to wait until you’re ready. They don’t force you to do something that scares you or will make you unhappy.

Love is kind.

Someone who loves you is not mean to you or anyone you love. To be clear, in moments that they’re playfully teasing you, they’ll go out of their way to reassure you that they always mean well & would never purposely hurt or be malicious towards you.

I dated someone who told me that my sister was annoying & self-centered. I immediately came to my sister’s defense, since he only spent time with her when she was visiting me at school. My sister would talk a lot because she was updating me about her life since we lived apart for the majority of the year. His unkind comments about her when she wasn’t around were unwarranted & not true. Another unkind memory from an ex is being told that the erotic & seductive faces I make “in the bedroom” are very unattractive. Thinking about that insult gives me anxiety, & it still makes me self-conscious about the way I look whenever I’m about to be intimate with someone new.

Love does not envy.

I dated someone who would cry & call themselves dumb whenever he would fail & I got an A on an exam or a paper for the same class. Someone who loves you will not make you feel guilty for being you. They will want to celebrate your successes in school or your career. They’re not intimidated by the amazing qualities that you possess that make you, YOU.

Love does not boast.

When I worked as a Bank Teller, men would flaunt their money to make me go “weak in the knees” far too often. I also dated someone who bragged about how good he looked naked after losing 30 lbs, inviting me to watch him change every chance he got. But love is not proud or self-seeking, & it does not shame others. Being attractive & wealthy is one thing, but showing off or thinking that you’re better than others is unnecessary. In my opinion, acting in this manner is just a mask to cover up how insecure they potentially are on the inside.

Love isnt easily angered.

Someone I dated walked out on me, despite having a broken ankle, because I was watching a video from a dance battle, where my dance crew beat his. He didn’t even bother to tell me to not watch it in front of him or that he was upset. He just up & left with no warning or communication that I had done anything wrong. I also dated someone who got upset when I no longer wanted him to control my diet any longer. Someone who loves you will be willing to talk to you about an issue that hurts or upsets them before getting angry.

Using my favorite bible verse, while reflecting on my past loves helped me easily decipher who truly loved me & who did not, so I hope that it helps you too. Love at its best is selfless care & respect. A person who truly loves you will always respect your boundaries over their own desires.

Someone who loves you buys your favorite snacks on a road trip without being asked. They insist on bringing you a care package with medicine & personal care remedies when you’re sick. Your love prepares a plate for you when you’re too preoccupied to ensure you eat. They defend & protect you, even when you’re not around. If your person repeatedly hurts or mistreats you in any of the ways listed above, it’s safe to say that they do not love you. Learn the difference between what love is and is not, because unconditional love is not the same as unconditional tolerance.

XO Denise

sakura tree

How To Be Emotionally Available

Most relationship bloggers I come across always write about “How To Deal with an Emotionally Unavailable Man”. Today, I want to switch the perspective to focus on you. Because if you’re attracting emotionally unavailable partners, the bigger root of the issue is that you’re most likely not emotionally available either. You attract partners who match your energy & vibe. Don’t immediately blame your partner for their emotional unavailability. Take a close look at yourself in the mirror, & realize that your heart isn’t healed, open to new love, or ready for an unconditionally loving relationship either. It’s time to learn how to be emotionally available!

Choosing Emotionally Unavailable Partners

I have a long history of choosing emotionally unavailable partners. I proactively stayed single until I was 18 years old. As a college-bound nerd, I didn’t even want to think about actually having a boyfriend in school. I didn’t date anyone until after securing my 3.8 GPA & getting my early acceptance into the University of California system. But waiting until I was 18, didn’t actually help me much in the dating department. Instead, I was too young & unsure of who I was or what I even wanted in a boyfriend.

Over time, I learned that having a crush isn’t a good reason to get into a relationship. In fact, it’s during the early stages of infatuation that you need to stay the most alert. Always stay rational to ensure you’re not just getting swept up by your hormones.

To be emotionally available, you need to be just that. You have to let yourself feel your emotions but not let them cloud your judgment. Allow your partner to move through their emotions, empathize with how they feel, & reassure them that their feelings are valid. This is also emotional intelligence. When you’re emotionally intelligent, you open your heart to love & allow others to open their heart to you without fear.

Be Yourself

No matter how terrifying it is to be intimate & vulnerable, be yourself. If you’re putting up a facade to keep someone interested, you’re asking for trouble. Let’s consider my favorite Disney movie, Aladdin. Princess Jasmine developed feelings for him as a poor, thieving, street rat, but Aladdin refuses to listen to Genie’s encouragement to be himself. Instead, he creates an elaborate scheme to make Jasmine believe his lies as Prince Ali Ababwa. By being himself & telling the truth, he would have prevented so much unnecessary conflict. No matter how long & hard you try to pretend to be someone you’re not, your mask will eventually fall off. Let your partner see your true colors.

In my worst relationships, I would betray myself out of desperation & not wanting to be alone. I changed my appearance, my diet, my hobbies, & my lifestyle to become whomever my partner wanted me to be. Instead of staying true to myself, I dyed my hair blonde, straightened my hair, got expensive blowouts, wore tons of makeup, got eyelash extensions, & ate Paleo. I also learned how to breakdance, pop & lock, do Tae Kwon Do, & rock climb to “convince” my partners to fall deeply in love with me.

In my best relationship, he loved the natural texture of my hair, so I embraced my natural curls. Wearing makeup 24/7 to cover up my birthmark or freckles was unnecessary because he already saw me without makeup the weekend that we met. He made me feel irresistible & sexy while wearing basketball shorts or sweats. No guilt-tripping me into staying home with him instead. He was genuinely happy for me when I’d go to brunch, wine tastings, basketball games, concerts, or stand-up comedy shows with my friends & siblings. He encouraged my healthy habits of regularly attending RUMBLE boxing & SoulCycle classes. I could enjoy what I love to do & look however I wanted & still feel beautiful & perfect to him.

Love Unconditionally

Lastly, learn to love your partner unconditionally. If you’ve never been truly emotionally available, you’re setting yourself up to be loved by partners who put up a facade. They keep their options open, just in case, & keep secrets, & to control the relationship & you at all costs. Being emotionally available is taking a true leap of faith to allow another individual to love & see the real you. Open your heart to someone who wants to fall in love with all of your darkness & ugly sides, just as much as your beautiful ones. Even in your ugliest moments, trust that your partner will empathize & stay because being truly emotional available starts with you.

XO Denise

ancient ornamental wall in temple hall

Your Body is a Temple

Since February, I’ve been slowly decreasing my iPhone, iPad, & MacBook screen time. With my favorite TV show being Black Mirror & after watching The Social Dilemma, I had an epiphany when Lent began. I changed the settings on my iPhone to automatically lock me out of my apps at 10 pm. I now have about two solid hours away from screens before bed. Instead of scrolling, I read a book or write in a notebook or my journal before bedtime. I recently finished reading PS. I Still Love You by Jenny Han. This quote has really stuck with me: “My body is a temple not just any boy gets to worship at. I won’t do any more than I want to do.”

Virginity is Sacred

My mom stayed a virgin until she married my dad. Because of my mother, I thought that I’d wait until I got married too. My mom also got married at 28. It seemed too old, so I thought I’d be married & having sex with my husband by 25. In reality, I was too preoccupied with cheerleading, dance, & getting good grades in school to want to date anyone seriously. I didn’t get my 1st boyfriend until I was 18, after being accepted to the inaugural class at the University of California – Merced.

Even though my 1st two boyfriends pressured me to “give it up”, I did proudly remain a virgin until I was 21. But I will also finally admit that I embarrassingly lost my virginity out of spite & revenge in the end. I dated my second boyfriend for two years. Despite talking about marriage, in the last three months of our relationship, I was no longer worth the wait. He found & started sleeping with my replacement as soon as he broke up with me.

Societal Pressure

Young, heartbroken, & naive… I stopped trusting my own judgment & the morals I lived by. I was influenced by my friends who thought I was crazy for still being a virgin. After enough peer pressure, I decided to sleep with the next guy that gave me attention. While I waited for three dates to lose my virginity, I immediately knew in my heart that I had made a huge mistake. The “three-date rule” was created to allow women to engage in sexual activity without being branded a slut. But looking back, my heart was still healing. I did not know this new boy well enough to be sleeping with him. I just wanted to feed my ego. If I proved I was still desirable, my ex was stupid for dropping me for the 1st girl willing to sleep with him.

It’s a common saying that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone new. But with my personal dating history, it is clearly false. While it’s acceptable to quickly jump back onto the dating apps, my most successful relationship was after giving myself time to heal my heart. I took time to reflect on my past mistakes & get to know my next partner, before being intimate with them.

Swipe Culture

All of the men I meet on dating apps are only single first dates so far. My friends still judge me & label me as a prude. I never kissed a stranger or had a one-night stand, but I have zero regrets about it. I am 34 years old & still single. I’m proud to say that I’ve never settled for love. I’m not lonely, & I haven’t gotten pregnant by someone I don’t see a real future with. If I wanted it, I could have a comfortable life as a trophy wife to a rich man with my own kids already. But I’m waiting for the right man because I intend to only have one husband. Divorce is not, nor will it ever be, an option for me because, to me, love is all or nothing.

Lesson Learned

Due to my very high standards, I went 10 years without openly calling anyone that I dated my boyfriend. When I finally met a man I saw true potential with, I still didn’t refer to him as my boyfriend until several months after we started dating. When we met, we actually spent an entire weekend together, getting to know each other as friends. He asked me out on our first official date about a month later. And ironically, we did sleep together on our first date. But the foundation we already created as friends made me have no regrets about it. I learned so much about him during our first date. And I oddly knew more about his character & who he was in less than a month than I did with any other man I’ve dated. That says a lot considering that my longest relationship was on & off for 6 years.

Here’s how I knew I was right to trust him with my body the night of our first date:

He asks for consent.

While he went in for the first kiss with full force, he still asked if what he was doing was ok. No one else I dated has ever asked me for consent before trying to be physically intimate with me.

He always makes me feel comfortable & safe.

The way he looks at me & my body always made me feel so beautiful & cherished. He always approaches me slowly, touches me carefully, & asks questions to make sure that I’m ok. Your partner should ask or tell you what they want to do before actually doing it.

He never pressures me into doing more than I wanted to do.

We never needed to “spice things up” in the bedroom. In the times he feels he’s pushing my intimate boundaries, he checks in with me afterward. He was always open to learning what I liked & disliked for the future. It’s the way I trust him so much that no matter how we want to explore in the bedroom, I know in my heart he always cares & protects me.

While relationships are usually more passionate in the beginning, I’m pleasantly surprised that our spark never fizzles out. In fact, this past summer, we reached a different level of physical intimacy. We could sip water when we got thirsty, stop to get a snack, crack jokes about things that happened earlier that day, laugh hysterically, bring up any off-topic conversations, & still never miss a beat. It was a different level of intimacy that I didn’t even know existed. And I’ve never achieved it with anyone else since.

He told me his secrets, allowed me to move through my emotions, & never tried to control my reactions.

While we dated, he told me a lot of his secrets. He even told me ones that had the potential to really upset me & give me an opportunity to walk away from him for good. While some may say I’m naive & stupid, I always respect honesty. I love the way he remorsefully reassures me that he’s ok with however I react & decide to do next.

Looking to the Future

I still have close friends & family that are encouraging me to date more to get over my ex & “get under” someone new. But I’m being deliberately thoughtful about dating. I am also currently celibate. I’m proud of myself for taking the past 6 months to heal my heart & love myself first. I am truly happier having taken sex off the table. I’m not rushing to get into another relationship. I’m taking my time to ensure that I really know & get good vibes from the men that I’m connecting with. I already get hundreds of dating app matches & DMs on my social media accounts each week. I’m worth so much more than cheesy pickup lines & corny compliments about my body, eyes, & smile.

I LOVE HARD. I give myself to my partner fully when I truly fall in love. That’s probably why the majority of my exes still lurk me on social media. Whenever I’m newly single, it’s not long before the boys from my past come out of the woodwork, hoping for another shot. Even if I’ve already deleted their phone numbers or unfollowed them on my personal social media accounts. But this time around, I’m trusting my instincts when it comes to love because I deserve only the best. Society claims that we should live without regrets. But if I could go back in time & stop myself from being intimate with the wrong people, I’d do it in a heartbeat. While I can’t get my virginity back, waiting to give myself to the right man is the next best thing. My body is & will always be sacred. It is a privilege to achieve any level of intimacy with me. Because not just anyone deserves to worship at my temple.

XO Denise